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Who’s Smarter
A woman and a man are involved in a car accident; it’s a bad one. Both of their cars are totally demolished but amazingly neither of them are hurt.
After they crawl out of their cars, the woman says, “Wow, just look at our cars! There’s nothing left, but fortunately we are unhurt. This must be a sign from God that we should meet and be friends and live together in peace for the rest of our days.”
The man replied, “I agree with you completely. This must be a sign from God!”
The woman continued, “And look at this, here’s another miracle. My car is completely demolished but this bottle of wine didn’t break. Surely God wants us to drink this wine and celebrate our good fortune.”
Then she hands the bottle to the man. The man nods his head in agreement, opens it, drinks half the bottle, and extends it back to the woman.
Politely, the woman refuses to accept the bottle.
The man asks, “Aren’t you having any?”
The woman replies, “No. I think I’ll just wait for the police…”
HK Woman missed her flight
Lolz.
I wonder will I be that crazy if i miss my flight this April? Or even worse?
A doctor and a lawyer were attending a cocktail party when the doctor was approached by a man who asked him how to handle his ulcer. The doctor mumbled some medical advice, then turned to the lawyer and asked: “How do you handle the situation when you’re asked for free advice during a social function?”
“I just write up a bill and send it off in the mail afterward,” replied the lawyer.
The next morning the doctor arrived at his surgery and wrote a $50 bill for the ulcer-stricken man. That afternoon he received a $100 account from the lawyer.
Um, below is the 25 things about me thingy that has been going around facebook. So ya, as seen on my facebook profile.
1. I used to be a Lame king, until someone, no, make it two someone overthrow me and I never regain my title since. Heard that PK? And Wei Wu, when you visit the Grand Palace in Thailand, did you sit down on the throne seat in the throne room? Cause you have a title, giving you the rights to do it. Haha. But! No one can snatch my Emo king title! Wahaha. When it comes to being emo, no one can beat me.
2. I have a bunch of damn good friends, of which without them, there will be no me. They are that important. Within this bunch there is a sub group which I like to refer to as the band of drinking brothers. And within this sub group there is another sub group which is normally referred to as the west side gang.
3. I am the youngest in my family and my extended family. I am at least 11 years younger than my closest sibling in terms of order of birth, 5 or 6 years younger than my closest cousin in terms of order of birth over at my mother’ side. Can’t remember the difference for my father’s side though. But rough estimate bring the number at 8.
4. I love movies. Me think it is the best invention, evar.
5. I love music. However, I am sad that I have no one or band to jam with all day all night and this is one regret I will carry forever. I blame it partly on my shyness and my laziness to pick up an instrument.
6. Speaking of regret, I regretted deeply that I played way too much during my JC days and subsequently screwed up my “A” Levels results. Hey, to be honest, I rather be in NTU or NUS now.
7. I love travelling. Getting out of the country always excites me, even if it is just across the causeway. Hence my secret obsession with our Changi Airport. My ideal destination is Paris. But I always firmly believe travelling to another country is to experience the local culture there. Tourists’ attractions other than museums unique to the country are the worse ways to do it. Staying with the locals, visiting places where the locals frequent or following them as they go around their daily routine are better ways to soak up the culture.
8. I like Hong Kong, Japanese and Singapore drama series in that order. I can’t stand tear-jerking and long-winded Korean drama series save for some and please, don’t ask me to sit through Taiwanese drama series. I rather watch anime then, which in my humble opinion is the best alternative to drama series.
9. My brain processes science and math better but I like the arts more. Hence I want to pursue careers related to the arts rather than science and math, even though they pay more. Hey, artists over engineer anytime man.
10. So the above point kind of explains my love for theater. In fact, my dream job is to be an actor with a theater group that travels around the world to perform. I get to perform on stage and at the same time fulfill my love of travelling around the world (refer to pt. 7), killing two birds with one stone.
11. I used to be very anal about my handwriting. Any minor flaws and I will either liquid the whole word or the whole sentence off. This is how particular I am. But everything changed once Social Studies essays kick in and when my teacher told me “O” Levels do not allow liquid paper.
12. I like coffee, hence the reason I work at Starbucks.
13. But other than coffee, I like Chinese tea and beer too. Of course, a bottle of aged whisky won’t hurt too.
14. I have a weird stomach. It definitely does not follow any normal biological pattern. I can be very full at 2 in the afternoon and dinner can be as late as 10 in the evening.
15. Speaking of which, my body’s biological clock is severely screwed up. I can stay up for one whole day and yet face a new day with less than 6 hours of sleep. Then there are times where I can sleep for more than 24 hours non-consecutively with intervals less than 5 minutes.
16. I wanted to be a policeman or a lawyer or a fire fighter when I was young, all thanks to watching too much HK drama series.
17. But I grew out of all these when I am in JC. I seriously wanted to pursue interior design at one point in life before reality sinks in and told me that my creativity brain cells are all dead, thanks to both the “O” and “A” Levels.
18. However, my love for flying never changes. I almost want to take up aeronautical engineering even though I hate engineering, I know I will die while studying and I am glad my grades prevented me for travelling this suicide path. So now I am considering getting a chopper pilot license.
19. I am still confused over my future career path. Part of me wants to work in a PR firm. Another part wants to work in an advertising agency. But a larger part says social media.
20. I think the most awesome martial arts are Wing Chun and Kendo.
21. Contrary to what other people think, I love to shop. Wei Chuan can be my witness. But he hates shopping with me because whenever we shop, he is the one who ends up with lots of purchases while I have only one or none. Hey, if nothing catches my eye, you cannot blame me right?
22. I have a serious case of procrastinating. I may have a task at hand but I can always procrastinate until who knows when. If there is a deadline, I can plan out so well that every day I will do a bit here, tomorrow a bit there and finish it by the deadline.
23. I always believe there are two sides to a story, human or whatever. Hence we cannot make and judgments until we learned both sides of the story. This belief is strengthened after studying psychology.
24. I generally am not picky about food. But some things are really off limits. Like insects. WTH?
25. And lastly, I love reading. But nowadays I am too lazy to pick up a book to read. Think of it as a form of procrastination ba, especially when I have made a resolution last year to start reading.
Um, a bit exhaustive la. But definitely not 25 essays right?
Nike: Ignite
Nike. Oh yeah.
Arsenal players. Even better.
Nike and Arsenal players. Best la!
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But the ending sucks la!
The management and staff of pagefiveparasix.wordpress.com would like to wish all readers a
Happy Valentine Day!
Wishing all the couples out there to have a wonderful day ahead and may love be all around!
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[Edit] On a totally irrelevant note, i dropped by Bugis Street this evening and wah! The crowd is so pathetic for a weekend that even the weekdays crowd seems so much better.
Little Johnny and Janice go to Sunday School
Little Janice was not the best student in Sunday school. Usually she slept through class. One day the teacher called on her while she was napping, “Tell me Janice, who created the universe?” When Janice didn’t stir, little Johnny, a boy seated in the chair behind her, took a pin and jabbed her in the rear.
“God Almighty!” shouted Janice and the teacher said, “Very good” and Janice fell back asleep.
A while later the teacher asked Janice, “Who is our Lord and Savior.” But, Janice didn’t even stir from her slumber. Once again, Johnny came to the rescue and stuck her again.
“Jesus Christ!” shouted Janice and the teacher said, “Very good,” and Janice fell back asleep.
Then the teacher asked Janice a third question. “What did Eve say to Adam after she had her twenty-third child?” and again, Johnny jabbed her with the pin.
This time Janice jumped up and shouted, “If you stick me with that thing one more time, I’ll break it in half and stick it up your ass!”
… the teacher fainted!
Is it just me or what?
Somehow, i think Linda Chung(鍾嘉欣) looks very much like Charmaine Sheh(佘詩曼).
Really! Machiam twins sia. While watching the first few episodes of Always Ready the drama series, i can’t differentiate between Charmaine and Linda. I always thought, “Eh? How come got one scene she is lying unconscious in the hospital and the next scene she is walking around like a healthy person?”
See what i mean? I swear it is not due to my iconic memory. I just can’t help but feel that both are twins, despite the obvious difference in surname. Oh well. Maybe i should just concentrate on the plot of the show and stop ogling at the female leads.
Oh, so it is Thursday again. Time to bitch huh? Haha.
Oh well, i need a channel to vent my (insert whatever you deem fit).
I realised that once you start working, time seems to pass either very fast or very slow. Sometimes when I just clock in for work, a slam immediately appeared. For your info, “slam” in Starbucks lingo refers to a large group of customers coming in at the same time. Hence i always like what someone told me long ago.
“The customers ar, machiam like army like that. They fall in outside the door, then they march in in sequence wor.”
Having a slam may be tiring. Your body automatically becomes a machine, over-riding any commands from the brain. Your hands will just prepare orders after orders and will only stop after all the customers have gotten their drinks.
But hey, it is fun, really. And time passes very quickly this way. Soon, it is time for a break and the next thing you know, it is time to knock off. I would prefer this kind of days anytime over days whereby the customer flow is slow and time seems to drag on. You would find yourself constantly checking the time and finding things to do, even if they are of low priorities. Seriously, when it is time to knock off, you can’t wait to escape from the boredom of work.
It just happened that this week belongs to the latter. Not that time drags on slowly, but rather, the days drag on slowly. Half the time during the week i was hoping that today is friday but i was always disappointed. I really wanted to just stay at home and slack around with my favourite music playing in the background. Maybe it is because i am very tired due to lack of sleep, or because i am sick of the monotonous routine of work or maybe simply because i have got an impending exam and i have no mood to study for it.
Oh well, at least tomorrow is finally friday. Now the most important thing is to be able to find the study mood back soon and that last-minute revisions help. Any recommendations on which Buddha’s leg is the best to hug?
On a brighter note, i MAY become an intern! Haha. Went for an interview at a PR firm yesterday night and seriously, i don’t know how i fare. So now i can only keep my fingers crossed and pray hard. Hopefully, my application will be successful cause honestly, i can do with a change of work environment.
Now, before i end, let me just update you guys about something. Remember not too long ago i bitch about the Association of Bloggers (Singapore)? As of now, around 7 or 8 of the 10-man committee has quitted, leaving the president with one or two of the original founding members left. Aiyo, why like that? How are they supposed to unite the so-called “loose sand” bloggers when they can’t even unite themselves?
Heineken Ad – Casino Royale Version
I think i seriously need a bottle of Heineken soon…
