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FBI Interview
The FBI is considering hiring one of three men. They bring them in to speak with the interviewer separately. The first man comes in and sits down. The interviewer asks him: “Do you love your wife?”
He replies: “Yes I do, sir.”
“Do you love your country?” asks the interviewer.
“Yes I do, sir.”
The interviewer continues: “What do you love more, your wife or your country?”
He replies: “My country, sir.”
The interviewer looks at the man, and continues: “Okay. We brought in your wife. Take this gun and go into the next room and kill her.”
The man goes into the room, and all is silent for about five minutes. He comes back, with his tie loosened and he is all sweaty. He puts down the gun and leaves. The second guy comes in and sits down. The interviewer asks him the same questions, and the responses are the same. The interviewer gives him a gun, and tells him to go kill his wife. The guy puts the gun down and says “I can’t do it…”
The third guy comes in, the same thing happens. The interviewer gives him a gun, and tells him to go kill his wife. The guy goes into the room, and BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM!
This is followed by a bunch of crashing sounds that end after a few minutes. The guy comes out of the room with his tie loosened, and puts the gun on the table. The interviewer looks at him and says: “What happened?!?!”
The guy replies: “The gun you gave me was filled with blanks so I had to strangle her!”
Today is the fourth day of the Lunar New Year and most people are back to work. Oh well, the reality of life.
Anyway, nothing to bitch about. Really. Chinese New Year celebrations last for 15 days right? Haiyo, don’t bitch too much during this period. Not good not good.
This year, Mum was away during the first 2 days of CNY, meaning house visiting is limited. No, make it severely limited. I only went to my aunt’s house. Income is pathetic. I can fully feel the full force of the current recession upon me.
On a brighter note, I got a younger sister recently! Yeah! No no, she didn’t pop out of my mum’s womb like Sun Wu Kong. Siao ar?
Let me proudly introduce you to Amanda!
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Eh, due to sheer laziness, i only provide the link to her blog. Haha
Got a new pair of jeans too! Remember Levi’s is having that promotion whereby if you trade in your old pair of jeans, they will give you a $50 discount when you buy a new pair? Yeah yeah. Did just that.
What makes my purchase even more worthwhile is that Levi’s will be donating the old jeans they collected to the poor in Thailand and Cambodia, according to a Jan 9 2009 Lian He Zao Bao article.
Hey, if i can recycle my old pair of jeans for charity and get a new one at $50 off, why not?
Chinese New Year Fireworks
How can CNY do without some fireworks?
As we send away our dear Rat and welcome brother Ox, the management and staff of pagefiveparasix.wordpress.com would like to wish every reader a
Happy Lunar New Year!
Wishing everyone a smooth year ahead in the Year of the Ox.
牛年快乐！
恭喜发财！
万事如意！
牛年行大运！
OMFG! OMFG! OMFG!
I am totally speechless.
I can’t believe it.
I was mentioned on Cowboy Caleb’s blog for my bitching post on the Association of Bloggers (Singapore).
There there! The 2nd paragraph!
Original post here.
Okay, maybe i was not directly mentioned, but still…
Wah seh!
High liao! High liao!
Cowboy Caleb leh! Wah kao. The Zeus of the local blogging scene.
And look at the traffic he directed to my blog!
Wah seh.
I can only surrender to the power of Zeus…
Six Inches
Coming into the bar and ordering a double, the man leaned over and confided to the bartender: “I’m so pissed off!”
“Oh yeah? What happened?” asked the bartender politely.
“I met this beautiful woman who invited me back to her home. We stripped off our clothes and jumped into bed and we were just about to make love when her goddamned husband came in the front door. So, I had to jump out of the bedroom window and hang from the ledge by my fingernails!”
“Gee, that’s tough!” commiserated the bartender.
“Right, but that’s not what really got me aggravated,” the customer went on.
“When her husband came into the room he said: ‘Hey great! You’re naked already! Let me just take a leak.’ And damned if the lazy son of a bitch didn’t piss out the window right onto my head?”
“Yeech!” the bartender shook his head: “No wonder you’re in a lousy mood.”
“Yeah, but I haven’t told you what really, really got to me.
Next, I had to listen to them grunting and groaning and when they finished, the husband tossed his condom out of the window. And where does it land? My damned forehead!”
“Damn, that really is a drag!” said the bartender.
“Oh, I’m not finished. See, what really pissed me off was when the husband had to take a dump. It turns out that their toilet is broken, so he stuck his ass out of the window and let loose right on my head!”
The bartender paled: “That would sure mess up my day.”
“Yeah, yeah, yeah,” the fellow rattled on. “But do you know what REALLY, REALLY, REALLY pissed me off? When I looked down and saw that my feet were only SIX inches from the ground!!”
I am supposed to bitch about some stuff in my life today.
Ya la! Of else called Bitching Thursday for what?
But, i realised that i have nothing to bitch about. Maybe it is because i take whatever life throws at me. Sometimes in life, you just have to suck it up and move on, cause moving on always help and a better tomorrow awaits you. Damn, i just realised i sound a bit cheem. Haha
Anyway! Just as i was about to skip bitching posting today, i came across this… um… this Association of Bloggers (Singapore). Sounds grand right? Like, WOW! Association sia. Before i click on the link, my mind was going, “Wah, this Mr Brown and Xia Xue coming up with some association huh?” When the page has finished loading, i almost puked out my drink.
WAH KAO?! Who on the blardy earth are these people?? What the fuck is going on? Why isn’t Mr Brown or Xia Xue in it??
Okay okay. Let me regain my composure.
Seriously, i don’t know whether should i laugh at their stupidity or pity them for their naive thinking. Creating an association for bloggers? Siao ar?
I am lazy to touch on them la. Go Google or Yahoo them. But i can tell you, this is big news and the impact it created in Singapore blogosphere is big with a capital b.
Firstly, the association is created by an unknown blogger (okay okay, maybe a bit famous). But, if local blogging titans like Mr Brown and Cowboy Caleb not forming any association, what the fuck is the unknown blogger doing?? And she take it one step further. She went to register the association with Ministry of Home Affairs. Wah kao.
According to the association president, they are planning to have an annual “Singapore Bloggers Conference” and workshops to help bloggers write better. My foot man!! I bet she has not heard of the Singapore Bloggers Convention held way back in 2005. To me, that is something. Go read up on the review by Malaysia blogging titan Kenny Sia. If the association can do something better than the 2005 convention, then local bloggers will start taking them seriously. If not, just shut the fuck up about being a “professional body for bloggers in Singapore.” And i certainly don’t need anyone teaching me how to write on my blog. My blog is my blog and i choose to write my entries either in near-perfect English or Singlish.
Furthermore, the association was set up in secret. For what?? If your aim is to get as many local bloggers to join as possible, you should be actively promoting your cause and not hide in some corner, inviting only a selected few unknown bloggers and claim to represent the local blogosphere. Seriously, their PR and marketing sucks, big time. And they dare to ask for $110? My goodness, i rather spend that money on buying some Gundam models and form the Association of Gundam.
And don’t give me the shit about “working with manufacturers, service providers, businesses to promote their products and services. Education visits to production factories. Product launches invites. This is a great time for merchants or service providers to show case their latest gadgets/ service to our bloggers.” For fuck? Why do i want to get in touch with merchants? So they can pay me money to put their ads on my blog? Mad ar? She(the president) certainly don’t understand how the industry works. First of all, there is nuffang! Enough said. Secondly, bloggers are not professional reporters. Why would a merchant waste money on bloggers when their money is better spent on wooing the conventional and mainstream media. Trust me, many people still trust reviews by professional reporters published on newspapers. Merchants are not dumb and so is their PR department. The PR peeps will only find bloggers with high traffic to their blog. You think Apple PR people will ask me to review their latest iPod because i am a hugh fan? Bullshit.
As we can see, they are fucking money-orientated. Their purpose is to earn money through blogs. What visits to factories la, merchants showcasing their newest gadgets la. Fat hope man. You will never succeed, unless you can be as famous as Kenny Sia or Mr Brown. Tell me honestly, who can achieve this kind of fame overnight?
Speaking of Mr Brown, have they no respect for Singapore very own blogging titans? I am sure most Singapore bloggers have heard of Mr Brown, Mr Miyagi, Cowboy Caleb, Xia Xue and Popagandhi. They have been around in this local blogosphere for quite a while and the community they formed, Tomorrow.sg, is somewhat of the Royal Family of Singapore blogosphere. By forming an association that claims to represent the local blogosphere right under their nose, they got to be mad. Not only do they totally ignore the existence of Tomorrow.sg, they ignore the titans by not including them in the association. Tsk tsk tsk.
What makes me laugh out loud is that the president claims that the local blogging scene is “controlled by foreign bloggers based in Singapore”. Are you sure? How they control? Evidence? Come on.
[Edit]: On a more personal note, I always believe that blogging is something personal, a private activity. There are various categories of blogs around but ultimately, a blog is a platform for the blogger to express their personal views on issues around them. Hence we got blogs that discuss the political scene in their respective country and blogs that simply act as a diary for the blogger. So, my question is, is there really a need to form an association to unite bloggers? People unite for a cause. In this case, unite the local bloggers for what cause? To earn money? To engage the government? Unless there is a clear cause, I don’t see the need to join any bloggers association. I rather be one of the millions of independent bloggers around the world using our blog either as a diary or as a platform to air our views responsibly.
In my humble opinion, i really think the whole Association of Bloggers (Singapore) idea is a big joke.
Claiming to be a professional body without the inclusion of local blogging titans is bullshit.
Registering with MHA is lame.
Trying to be a distinct new media. You guys need Social Media lessons. Then again, do they know what is Social Media in the first place?
Trying to form a collective of blogs aim at making money through ads? Let us see who is stronger, you guys or nuffnang.
Let us all cross our fingers and see how long will the association last.
Left 4 Dead Intro Video
I just love seeing the Tank dashing out, making a big mess before he is killed by us the survivors.
Today is Bush’s last day as President of the United States and tomorrow at 11am US time, US and the whole world will welcome Barack Obama as he is sworn in as the 44th President of the United State in front of the United States Capitol.
We shall now see whether he can work on the promises he mentioned during his campaign and bring change to the US and subsequently the world. The most pressing issue on everybody’s mind is how is he going to settle the current economic crisis and the Israel-Hamas conflict. His every action, his every speech is going to be watched and listened by millions around the world. I just hope he can live up to the expectations and deliver change as promised. It is time to see a new era in the US history.
It has been ages since i am last hooked to a FPS(First Person Shooter) game. Counter-Strike and Battlefield are fun but not as addictive as Left4Dead. The gameplay is simple, the graphics is good, there is an attempt to make the game as realistic as possible and the game’s AI is well balanced.
In fact, I just need to tell someone who has not played the game before that your job is to survive, kill, heal while covering your friend’s ass. Simple. Trust me, he just need 5 minutes to familiarise himself with the keys and 10 minutes into the game and everyone will be shouting, “Hunter, help me! Aargh, got Tank got Tank!”
But always remember, bring your friends along and cover their ass.
